How does one be in a serious, monogamous relationship without being attached? I mean, when I talk to someone everyday, or a lot it’s easy to get used to that and become attached. I’ve also been thinking about the phrase “I love you”, and would like your opinion on it. Doesn’t the phrase kind of create a separateness?
Language in general implies separateness but that is the limitation we accept when using it. We create our world and our image of ourselves out of describable language, all the while forgetting that the indescribable nature of reality far outweighs our paltry words.
To make a relationship “serious” is to kill it before it has even fully matured. Seriousness is so tense, always waiting for something to go wrong. I would recommend a loving relationship over a serious relationship.
I agree that it is easy to get used to what occurs regularly throughout our days, whether that be someone else’s presence in our lives or just the fact that the sun has risen once more.
Remember that everything will end. Your partner will die, you will die, this world will crumble. Whether it’s 100 years from now or 100 million years from now. Keep things in perspective.
Taking something for granted means to assume that it is permanent. Nothing in this world of form is permanent. When you really get that into your head and heart, and come to accept it, enormous gratitude for what is here becomes possible.
Remember that attachment is ignorance. In reality, nothing is attached. Everything is freely flowing and changing. Attachment is purely a mental/emotional phenomenon. It makes insecurity and fear possible.
Where attachment is missing, love flourishes.